Christmas Worries Over Nothing

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Ok I admit it. I LOVE Christmas but this year I was kind of dreading our family Christmas gathering.

It’s hard being the only single in your family that’s over the age of 4, and usually it gets noticed and sadly pointed out. I was dreading the usual questions as all my cousins and sister cuddled up to their partners/ husbands and asked whether I’m currently seeing anyone and the inevitable looks of pity when I say I’m not. I was mentally preparing myself for the match-making conversation that would of course follow this realisation as I have heard it all before and HATE being set up.

I know people mean well when they go through all their semi-decent single friends lists and think about who would be good for me, but really it just makes me feel like they think being single is some disease they need to cure me of. It’s not a disease and I am more than capable to finding a date myself.

This year was different though. Nobody mentioned my state of singleness. Huzzah! Perhaps it’s due to the fact my sister and one of my cousins recently tried to go there within the last few weeks and knew I was not keen on being set up. It’s possible they told the others not to go there on Christmas or maybe…just maybe….people are starting to work out that when a single is with a group of couples they don’t generally like to discuss it and if they want to it should be them themselves and ONLY them themselves that should bring it up. So yay family! Thank you for not putting me in that position this Christmas.

Another good thing this Christmas, which is probably going to make me sound like a horrible person, is that a few of us were currently unemployed or as I’d prefer to say ‘between jobs’.

Now I wish everyone well, and am not happy when things are going badly for other people, but we all had a good sense of humour about it and it’s nice when there are a few of you in the same boat as no one feels like the failure of the group. We all know this is a temporary state of being ( all recently unemployed so for now we are enjoying the time off) and we will all get jobs next year * fingers crossed for permanent ones.* I think it’s just human nature like to know other are in the same or similar situations as you. We even had a toast to unemployment lol

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and if you were single or unemployed or both this Christmas I hope the people around you didn’t bring unwanted attention to it ❤️

So to all the single unemployed people this holiday season “Cheers”

 

 

The Ongoing Saga of Finding a Permanent Job.

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When I chose to do a degree in Primary Education I thought I was making a safe choice. I thought to myself ‘this is one career where I am sure to secure a job as society needs teachers and plenty of full time jobs will become available soon as all the old teachers are going to retire soon’.

Well, fast forward eight years and three teaching based degrees later and I still haven’t had a permanent job. Ironically I should have probably pursued my to other choices of acting or palaeontology but I decided not to go in that direction as those jobs are hard to come by, and teaching is a “sure thing”.

Now I’ve always had work as a casual or temporary teacher, so it hasn’t been a complete disaster but after applying for over 100 jobs ( I use to count my applications, but I stopped counting when close to 100 as it got a little depressing) one does get a little disheartened. I have had one-to-one sessions with various deputy principals and attended webinars on how to write good teaching applications, so I know it’s not a case of writing bad resumes it’s just really hard to get a permeant job in primary teaching unless you are targeted straight out of university, are male (most of my male friends never had to apply for a job they were just offered positions) or know someone. I’m not saying it CAN’T be done; I’m just saying it’s bloody hard and if you secure one of these jobs that’s amazing, and you should be very thankful.

Lately, I’ve been wondering if it’s time to throw in the towel on teaching. My experience of teaching hasn’t been the best. I’ve worked mostly in the more difficult schools (low social economic areas) and as I’ve been mainly a casual or temp I haven’t been treated very well. Do you remember how your class treated the casual teacher when your teacher was away? There are exceptions but for the most part, casual teachers get “special” treatment from the students and not in a good way. I’m not saying I can’t handle it, I’ve handled it for eight years, but it’s exhausting being tested by the students day in day out. Respect is not very high these days unfortunately.

My temp blocks have been a blessing as it means constant work for a while, but most of these have happened towards the end of the year or in a part-time or RFF (relief from face-to-face) capacity which means I get a lot of “your not my real teacher” attitudes. I would love to be the teacher starting day one term 1 for a change so I can establish more of a rapport with the students, make the class rules together and not constantly be told off by students about doing things differently from their previous teacher.

Now before anyone says anything I have done every behaviour management strategy in the book (I’ve even bought and read an actual book on it). I try to be positive and constantly reinforce positive behaviour, but I’m getting tired of it all being about the discipline as I became a teacher to teach. If I wanted it to all be about the discipline, I would have become an army drill sergeant.

I’m not down on kids (although I may sound like it from the above). I always try to find something about each child I like and often they are all quite nice as individuals.I have had the privilege to work with some genuinely incredible kids and I know deep down I have made a positive impact on many lives ( or at least that is my sincere hope). It’s just that showing off pack mentality that upsets me and not caring about the awards or punishments.

So I’ve made the decision to apply for a few more teaching positions that appeal to me until the end of the year and if I don’t get any of these positions I’m leaving the profession. I really thought I’d have permeant work by 30 but unless that mythical job presents itself in the next four months that’s not going to happen. I think that if teaching was what God wanted me to do, I’d be doing it now. Maybe I’m meant to go down a different path.

I am always genuinely happy for my friends successes but at the risk of sounding petty I do wonder ‘is it my turn yet?’ It seems I’m still on square one of my career while others are getting promotions in their respective careers. I’ve tried so hard. I thought teaching in the outback would help but although it was a valuable life experience it hasn’t helped me secure that job. I thought doing the extra TESOL certificate would help but although it helped me get a few temp jobs I still am in want of permanency. I’m just sick of having no security.

Who knows? If I either by some miracle get one of the teaching jobs I’ve applied for I might have a job before 30, but I feel that’s very unlikely. Maybe I will get a permanent job in a completely different field before that dreaded age? Not all hope is lost!

Keep your fingers and toes crossed for me please.

 

The Obligatory Pre-30 Freakout

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Hello out there in Internetland,

As the title suggests, I am currently experiencing what I like to call “the obligatory  pre-30 freakout.”

For some reason many of us ( especially women but I’m going to assume many men too) give ourselves certain life deadlines to accomplish certain things. For me 30 was a deadline for many things and I thought these things could easily be achieved by this time. My checklist of things to have achieved by 30 looked like this:

  • Have a permanent job I enjoyed.
  • Own a property or at least have moved out of parents house.
  • Be married.
  • Have children or be at least planning to have children.

Previously I thought this list was quite reasonable and I think certain items on this check-list would look familiar to many people. I was willing to accept that not all things would be ticked off but I truely believed all would be firmly in the works. So a few months off my deadline what is my current situation you ask? Well, I live with my parents, am currently unemployed, have never had a long-term boyfriend and am currently single. So yes, I am currently experiencing the pre-30 freakout.

Now I don’t want this blog to be a negative thing. I am not writing it to gain sympathy either. I just want to share my thoughts as I think I am not alone in this boat. Logically I know having such a deadline is BLOODY POINTLESS!! But since when have I always been logical?

I have been wondering how it is I find myself in this undesirable situation and am trying to find the positives of it as curling up into a ball and feeling like a failure achieves nothing.

So let’s start at the job situation….

I am a primary school teacher and have been for 8 years. They told me at uni it would be easy to find a job as there would be a mass retirement and ” we need teachers”……they lied. What the should have said in uni was they needed MALE primary school teachers and high school teacher for physics, 4 unit maths and all the subjects few want to teach. Granted they couldn’t have foreseen the global financial crisis which caused many to loose their supers and hence not retire but *shrugs* oh well.

I have always had work as a causal and temporary teacher and am blessed to be in a career where I can work in my chosen profession without securing a permanent position but there is nostability in jumping from contact to contract. So I guess the positive is, although I’m without a permeant job, I know I’ll get work when school comes back and people start calling in sick or getting maternity leave. I won’t have to busk quite yet.

Now for living situation, which is related to job status. Who will rent to someone without a secure job? Who would give me  a loan? How can I move not knowing where I’m going to end up working? No point moving to one side of Sydney only to eventually get a job on the other.

Thankfully I do actually get on well with my parents so it isn’t all bad and I am saving lots of money while living here but still not quite what I wanted….. I have moved out a few times, once for uni exchange in Canada which was AWESOME, once to Broken Hill as I did some contracts out there and once to Switzerland for a few months because I could …so I’ve at least tasted freedom.

Finally, the singleness factor. I wasn’t overly concerned with dating until I reached my mid-twenties. Truth is, I enjoy my own company and company of my friends, which I think is an important skill to have. I’ve dated but never really clicked with anyone. So I’m sad that I feel like I’ve never experienced love ( romantic love anyway) but on the bright side I haven’t and will never settle.

So these are the kind of things I’ll be addressing in more detail through this blog. Once again, I want to make it clear this is not a ” oh, woe is me” blog. I know there is hope and my life is very good compared to many others, but I do want somewhere to share my thoughts and think these topics relate to many. So stayed tuned for my adventures in:

  • the never ending finding a job saga.
  • online dating
  • investgating moving out options
  • deciding what on Earth to do with my life
  • random crap that pops into my head.

Cheers,

Glittering Wings